So I have a mate, James. He rang me up one day to tell me one of his mates somehow reversed into his house. Broke the cast iron guttering and smashed the facia of the front of his house. He asked if I could fix this ASAP as there was a wedding happening there a week afterwards. I said of course. So I went about the task of scarfing in a new piece of pine into the original softwood facia. He gave it a lick of paint after I went…
